so headache.. hai. have you wondered how it feels to live in a stressed environment at home? Facing black faces at home with no apparent reason? *sighs*
still finding that little space of myself, just peacefulness and quietness in my life. finding that balance and finding my little place in that imperfect world.. I don't want a life that requires me to live up to other's expectations all the time! i want and i need to have a life on my own! I don't want people to dictate my life!
sigh. baby i hope i can lead a happy and blissful life with you love! sob.
worried about Saturday man..! sigh. but i really need some time for myself, leh!
anw.. if anyone's interested in working part-time at the bakery, let me know. tell your friends/relatives yea. (: thanks loads. (:
i know i haven't had time to update my blog after my birthday.. not sure if i am able to do it by this post but i will soon. I'm tired..! hehe.
*all pictures will be uploaded at a later date yea!*
Last Fri, Kel and Mab came by and we almost finished my 'poster' and it's real pretty lah! (: hehe. got glitter on the sides of my names and got stars! Yep. Woke up in the morning and prepared some stuff like cooking rice and soaking beehoon and all that. Luckily my mom helped out early cos we almost didn't make it on time. hehe. In the end, the menu became...
My 'door gift' came late, and it almost became a goodbye gift.. but i think many actually liked the cute little figurines on top! and i finally got my elephant!!! *cUTe!!* naarak!!! hehe. will post pics of it soon but i'm really busy.
Mab helped out with so many things.. Appreciate Kel for coming by even though she's so tired and had to make her take 3 taxis in a day... Appreciate De for helping me do the streamers, appreciate Caiqing, Han, Joyce and Caiqing's bf and the veg clan for helping me decorate the very big and not v.functional function room... (: I especially love my guest book in hanger style and also the heartshape balloons surrounding my very pretty poster! (: hehe.
Was nice meeting Joel again, after so many years losing contact. heh. Am so glad Mrs Lim made time to come to my party...
I appreciate all the gifts that you guys thoughtfully bought me... i really love each and everyone to bits! I really really love them so thanks ok... (:
Too bad baby wasn't around.. Cos i really missed him so much. He's real sweet though.. wished he could be here to blow the candle with me, and not just through sms. (: But it's ok, he's in my heart in whatever i do. (:
ya, talking about cutting cake, the cake was surprisingly nice, still. Yummified it with hershey's chocolate syrup!! like YumMy!!! *whEe~~~* (: yummy. Thanks lee han for cutting cake and giving out Huge portions to clear my cake man! (: (: Had some food left, mom and sis ate after they came home from work.. I wanted to eat after i bathed, but then i was damn tired till i just dived onto my bed and fell asleep in split second. lols.
Really want to thank my mom for all the help, well the whole cooking process was a hell lot of work... and brother for washing the dishes and mopping the floor and helping out in the party, and for coming down to attend the party, thanks SE for driving my cake down... And thanks my friends who made time to come down to the EAST, yes finally i got them all to the east, and for bearing with my being a lousy host...
*phew*
hm.. even so... I wish things at the shop will stabilize soon.. As in staff wise... Hopefully, things will be alright.. Worried for my mom man.. I mean i won't be able to help out at the shop soon.. and we seem to be understaffed. *sighS* Chinese wise saying is really wise, " 防人之心不可无"... It's sad.. but true..
Baby seem really really tired today... we didn't even send like 10 smses to each other today! ): had a nightmare last night. scary. Hopefully i can have a gdnight's rest tonight alr..
went to do alot of things today! woke up early today to go NTUC... Wanted to go out earlier and i thought i was going to rain. waited for a while and looked out to the sea. The storm has cleared but the grey clouds were still looming above over here. Decided not to wait anymore and went out and it started raining. -_-
Crazy me, bought so much stuff i think they're heavier than me! they're damn heavy lah.. i was just too ambitious. I have to commend this NTUC staff that was so thoughtful and alert to offer his help to this poor damsel, struggling with his 4/5 shopping bags weighing at least a ton!! haha. Anyway, took a cab home and luckily mom was still home to help me carry all the barang barang upstairs! (: The taxi uncle was also very very very helpful and nice! help us carry the things all the way into the porch area!! wow. (: i'm very happy!
Then unloaded the things at home and got out to Bugis to get all the stationary and stuff, ate fries from some yellafellaz store, which was alright lah i would say. I still prefer chou dou fu!!! Anw... went to give baby a surprise, again! haha. knew he was bored and his phone was dead. Anyway, i'm already planning to go Bugis so just nice lor.. (: *hUgs* haha. looks handsome today, as compared to that day he was wearing that polo t-shirt. hehe. baby got me to try mechanical pencil.. wah, it's really quite gd and it's selling @ 12for $5.40 ONLY!! oh gosh.. so cheap. i'm tempted to buy. hehe.
Anw, got all the stuffs today, hopefully got all of them lah if not still got tomorrow. hehehe.
really got lots of stuffs! is really alot! hm. ok.
i queued up for chou dou fu again today! yummy! it's even more yummy than thursdays'!!! *slUrpS* bought 1 for myself to eat on the way to Bras Basah and then bought 2 to take away. gave one to B. (: he likes it lor. hahaha. and thanks to Darren who fetched me/us home. Sorry if i stinked his car with chou dou fu!!! hahaha.. nice to see dan too. (:
nice evening! though the ride home was kinda scary.. hehe..
((: am an extremely happy girl today... cos i went out with baby and did so many things together! feeling a little tired from all the walking/shopping/eating/talking yada yada but i'm so happy! (: *hUgs*
Went out with baby from noon onwards, shopped for jacket(s), luggage cases, birthday dress, looked at TVs, clothes, ate chou dou fu together!! argh!! so nice! will be having some more.... real soon. *secret* hehe.
gosh, i'm totally not prepared for my birthday party/gathering. Someone, please kill me. Really. I haven't even got the stuffs ready! Thanks to mabs who will be selling me her leftover balloons etc.. I'm thinking of doing a mini banner for myself. like, welcome to LY's very early 21st! haha. It's really really early man. but whatever, i need a gathering with all my friends before i fly off! Sad that some people won't be able to make it but yea, i appreciate you guys as much as the rest yea, haha.
I'm revealing the food for my birthday...
1. fried rice 2. Sweet and Sour (veg.) pork <- hopefully it'll turn out ok it's my first time 3. croquette 4. Asparagus with mushrooms (or some veg i can find tmr) 5. egg tofu 6. Fried ngoh hiang 7. baked beans with ham
maybe i'll buy some veg curry.
hopefully, konniyaku jelly or whatever agar agar lah...
can? i think can. hehe. (:
anw... just feel very very xing fu and happy whenever i'm with baby... love us to bits. (:
from this moment, as long as i live, from this moment on..
it's gotta be my wedding song!
' Fly Away
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
living my dull life in a colourful world**
oh no... i made baby so angry.. ): guess i really pushed it to the limits. ): boOhOo.. )': me no like when baby's angry/sad. ):
b, i'm sorry, i know i should have respected you and told you where i was going. But i swear really, i seldom do that but i swear i was really feeling blur already.. really really didn't mean to hide it from you or what.. i really just felt blur... ): i'm super ultra apologetic now.. ):
Eventful day, met up with fab then went to shop, which was rather quiet today, and then went out with BBQ people for supper.. they're really a nice bunch.. Guess retail people are mostly like that ba. (: heh. more down to earth.. (:
gave baby a pleasant surprise but giving him a visit at his workplace (: heehee. But i felt so sad i could feel the tears in my eyes on the verge of falling out when i had to leave. )': could sense baby also was kinda sad too. *hUgs* b, really really wish i could spend more time with you... just love to have you around me. (:
What has our society turned into now? with humans made to conform to the 'social norms' and into economy generating machines? What's happening to the finer details in life? What's this life getting us into? hell? Why does everything revolve around money and power these days?
the answer?
Life's just unfair.
I'm not feeling sour because perhaps there is a million/zillion people out there in a better situation/position than me. It's because there's probably millions/billions of people who are doing worse than me, our stuck in the terrible cycle where money and power takes charge. The thirst for these 2 has indeed brought about much agony to many.
Life, is definitely more than that.
All humans that are born, are all heading towards one direction, and we all know that as humans we have to face death. I think that's a fact that we all should come to a common consensus, right? Why are people putting so much focus and attention on fighting for something that's only valid for one lifetime, investing their energy and efforts into building up their life and status only? Have they made preparations for the final destination?
Perhaps, some people would label me naive. But though baby's not a uni grad, and probably not gonna hold a degree, it doesn't really bother me really. I know i know.. money isn't everything but it is indeed SOMETHING, that i gotta agree. I wouldn't want to see the relationship turn sour due to money issues. But i'm confident we'll be able to work out a lifestyle that is suitable for us...
I know it takes more time for me too see things better, and i am open to it too.. I'm not trying to side him or anything, but i just feel that it's really unfair to label a person on his academic credentials and also by his wealth etc. hopefully u'll soon feel confident enough to face my family B... I know it's hard, perhaps it's a long and arduous journey.. but with a little effort and love, i'm sure we can do this together.
went out with baby today.. (: hee. we went AMK to get my foodstuffs for my 21st party/gathering. hee. Threw a little bit of tantrum at him today because we actually missed 2 buses! baah. haha.. Day went well, bought clothes for the UK trip, checked out TVs and cameras... shopped for winter clothings.. (: (: had too much fun today.. (: More of such wonderful sweet days ahead dear! (:
had a shoulder to lean on while sleeping on the bus today. (: (:
Large, rich inner store of information which they gather about people Highly observant and aware of people's feelings and reactions Excellent memory for details which are important to them Very in-tune with their surroundings - excellent sense of space and function Can be depended on to follow things through to completion Will work long and hard to see that jobs get done Stable, practical, down-to-earth - they dislike working with theory and abstract thought Dislike doing things which don't make sense to them Value security, tradition, and peaceful living Service-oriented: focused on what people need and want Kind and considerate Likely to put others' needs above their own Learn best with hands-on training Enjoy creating structure and order Take their responsibilities seriously Extremely uncomfortable with conflict and confrontation ISFJs have two basic traits which help define their best career direction: 1) they are extremely interested and in-tune with how other people are feeling, and 2) they enjoy creating structure and order, and are extremely good at it. Ideally, the ISFJ will choose a career in which they can use their exceptional people-observation skills to determine what people want or need, and then use their excellent organizational abilities to create a structured plan or environment for achieving what people want. Their excellent sense of space and function combined with their awareness of aesthetic quality also gives them quite special abilities in the more practical artistic endeavors, such as interior decorating and clothes design.
The following list of professions is built on our impressions of careers which would be especially suitable for an ISFJ. It is meant to be a starting place, rather than an exhaustive list. There are no guarantees that any or all of the careers listed here would be appropriate for you, or that your best career match is among those listed.
Possible Career Paths for the ISFJ:
Interior Decorators Designers Nurses Administrators and Managers Administrative Assistants Child Care / Early Childhood Development Social Work / Counselors Paralegals Clergy / Religious Workers Office Managers Shopkeepers Bookkeepers Home Economics
hm. i'll pick nurses, child care/early childhood devt., social work and office managers.
Finally got my confirmation from Loughborough. Oh man, i can't really believe that i'm actually going for SEP and away from Singapore for 5 months plus.. Gosh.. hm i really don't know what to expect but i guess i'll have fun! But i'm so gonna miss my the people here over in Singapore.. Hee. i think i'll bring mini along with me too. hee. can finally let him wear some winter clothings! lols. I'll miss baby alot alot too.
Will prob be flying off the last week of august, which is kinda soon. Gosh i'm so dead. I'm so unprepared... Mentally and also unprepared in terms of all the paper work and all the packing etc.
FINALLY!! met up with Cyn, Mabs and Kel! Congrats to Mabs who passed her driving today! (: WheE~ cool... Waited for Cyn for a while then ate. I drank Mushroom soup and potato wedges which was yummy, as usual. (: A little pricey though.. but yea, it's ok after the 25% discount. hahaha. I'm so gonna miss veg clan for 5 months! Hm really worried for my mom man hope she can hire someone so i can at least try to train up the staff and that i can leave responsibly? Like today, i had to keep looking over to the shop, really scared that they cannot cope... And i had to leave before Kel could finish her food.. Felt bad hahaha.. and they bought stuff and even helped me to clean the racks and pack the cold fridge outside! aiyo..! hehe. thanks guys.. (: Today's a really v.quiet day.. Felt like i didn't do much also.. hehe. slack. Gonna sleep early... cos i'm planning to meet sis for lunch tmr.
Realised the dress i wore out that day seems a bit bigger now i think it's just my imagination.. haha gonna try it on again after it's dry...
Was feeling a little okay and thus was more chatty to my mom today. Really v.v.v.tempted to ask her about josh but i didn't even know where to start... sigh. Why don't they ask me about it? hms. really wish things will turn out okay in the end... Every body needs more time to see carefully and thoroughly the real side of their other half. (:
B, miss u. sad i didn't catch you online or receive any mails from you today.. ): But it's okay cos you'll be back by Friday! (:
met up with Laoshi today.. (: I was kinda worried but when i saw laoshi, all that fear was just taken away. She really gave me some real good advices. I need to take a more active role to help b and my family be okay.. it takes time but what does not break us will make us stronger. (: Finally, got to take a load off my chest... for so long.. i can finally let it out.. And get some real good advice... I hope things work out.. eventually..
Sob. B sounded really disappointed today when i told him about the WDA thingy. ): i'll make sure if it's the sch's fault i will definitely make them apologize... Anw.. i didn't want to spoil his holiday mood so i didn't want to discuss this with him.. oh yes!! I saw baby online just now! (: (: so qiao.. I seldom go on MSN these days and then i saw his 'bro' appearing online.. it was him!! (: hehe.. what a pleasant surprise. (: i'm glad i came online tho i'm damn tired..
Saw another pretty dress online... well, i think i'll have to see what i bought from puffy's first.. before deciding on anything else.. hehe. oh gosh. i LOVE shopping. (: <3
I'm kinda happy abt my party cos it's just gonna be like a get-together session.. (: hehe. any ideas what programmes i can have for my guests? (: please throw in any ideas lor! I'm like gonna do the cooking myself.. for my honoured guests... (: hehe. does it scare u? lols. i'm a good cook alright..! :p
i really wish baby will agree to come to the party i know it's hard for him to over come that fear.. we'll see how it goes.. *hUgs!!*
Just a little girl in this world, still learning, growing, and experiencing life..
Keeping that little promise and agreement..
trying to be stronger.. ( :
WISHES;
happiness
health
semi-big bag
golden necklace
little miss CLUMSY
more intelligence
